I've had so many of these feelings recently with deciding to start my own newsletter, and publishing my knitting patterns. It's so difficult to balance humility and confidence.
I love your writing Aleesha. Your essay here is so poignant and resonates so deeply for me, and I expect many others.
First, thank you for being so honest and vulnerable in this piece, and clear about the journey and the path that may follow.
Second, your essay is so inspiring to me. Vulnerability is scary, and venturing out, even in pursuit of a fiery passion, can be a frightening journey. For me, life can feel like a series of ideas and inspirations stored away and not pursued, roads not taken because I feared what the journey might bring, but what others might judge. I applaud you for striking forth here, and inviting others like me to join you.
Lastly, your have a wonderful way with words, and I find your writing, engaging, thoughtful, ooen and easy to read. Thank you!
Thank you for being here alongside me, Larry. I hope we may take step by tentative step into what feels unknown and scary, but I think is so worth the risk.
You yourself have such a way of wholehearted encouragement that I admire and wish to learn from. You make others feel seen and valued -- what a beautiful gift 🎁
I relate to so much of what you are expressing here. Creating Weaving Wisdom has been a long form transformational process that continues to refine and deepen my intimacy with myself. The more I walk WITH my fears of being seen and received, the more I reveal my core internal needs and desires to my conscious awareness. I have been coming INTO clarity around my desire to flourish in this space, to share my creative weavings and offer my gifts into a fertile ecology that FEELS reciprocal and nourishing. "What does that even mean??!" I ask myself. And the deeper I inquire with this, the more I understand about what nourishes me, what signals resourcedness in my heart and body, and what my motivations are for showing up here. Its layered. And it includes a community of resonant folks who are willing to be part of what I am sharing. Its freakin vulnerable. Glad to hear others are IN this creative unfolding. 💞
You are SO not alone in this, navigating the slow unravelling of fears and motivations and narratives we believe. I’ve loved getting further into this community of creators on substack, the encouragement and engagement has been so uplifting, knowing I’m not alone in this and we all start somewhere
Aleesha, I always look forward to reading your posts. I’m thankful for your vulnerability and your thoughtful/ thought provoking questions.
My fears are that my dreams of fostering and adopting won’t come to fruition. It used to feel so close, and now it feels like a lifetime away. Like it will never happen, like I’m SUPER ill equipped to even consider being responsible for traumatized children ( sometimes even my own children!)
Wow, Julie, I’m not surprised that you’d want to foster/adopt, but I didn’t know that was your hope for the future! Raising children is no joke; I can understand how it feels overwhelming to just focus on your own family, let alone bringing more littles in.
How would you feel if you let your timeline be a bit further down the road?
The fear cage is realllllll. We are working on busting through some comfort bubbles right now, and a big one I’m also struggling with is the fear of failure. Even just writing it down, feels like a small achievement haha. It’s been interesting, personally, to trace the map back a bit and consider how/where it may have began and recognise just how much of my behaviours/actions were born out of fear, that I didn’t realise was even there. I definitely appreciate the word-keys ❤️
I think fear is a tricky thing; obviously we need it in some circumstances to be safe! But how often does the fear prevent us from doing something that is really meaningful to us? Thank you for being here on this journey with me, friend, as we navigate this tricky terrain ❤️
This is so beautifully articulated Aleesha. I am to one of those "early quitters", when somethings either feels too hard or sometimes even too easy. When I learned that this is another way perfectionism can show up I was amazed! I thought I was just lazy or someone who got bored easily or lacked the discipline to follow through.
I hadn't realised that underneath this "quitting" was a fear of failure.
Articulating dreams and hopes out loud to others than just ourselves is brave AND vulnerable.
I see you and I hold the vison with you that one day you will wake up to 300 new subscribers, and in the meantime, I have added one new one for you :)
That’s interesting, I think I’ve had those same tapes in my head each time I quit something, but I forgot them when I finally understood that perfectionism was the root. It’s so defeating to believe you are just flawed and can’t make your goal happen. But I feel like knowing it’s fear is maybe empowering? Like, I can’t change my basic personality, but I CAN move through the fear? Does that make sense?
Thank you for coming here, I’m so grateful to discover a larger substack community!
I've had so many of these feelings recently with deciding to start my own newsletter, and publishing my knitting patterns. It's so difficult to balance humility and confidence.
I hear you A. And am so glad you are following your passions!
Thank you, Larry! Having folks like you to receive it makes it easier!
😃🙏🏻😁
It is such a hard balance, and even speaking it out loud feels audacious to me. I’m right there with you as we take this journey side by side :)
I love your writing Aleesha. Your essay here is so poignant and resonates so deeply for me, and I expect many others.
First, thank you for being so honest and vulnerable in this piece, and clear about the journey and the path that may follow.
Second, your essay is so inspiring to me. Vulnerability is scary, and venturing out, even in pursuit of a fiery passion, can be a frightening journey. For me, life can feel like a series of ideas and inspirations stored away and not pursued, roads not taken because I feared what the journey might bring, but what others might judge. I applaud you for striking forth here, and inviting others like me to join you.
Lastly, your have a wonderful way with words, and I find your writing, engaging, thoughtful, ooen and easy to read. Thank you!
Thank you for being here alongside me, Larry. I hope we may take step by tentative step into what feels unknown and scary, but I think is so worth the risk.
You yourself have such a way of wholehearted encouragement that I admire and wish to learn from. You make others feel seen and valued -- what a beautiful gift 🎁
Thank you Aleesha for your very kind words. It is a joy to be journeying with you!
I relate to so much of what you are expressing here. Creating Weaving Wisdom has been a long form transformational process that continues to refine and deepen my intimacy with myself. The more I walk WITH my fears of being seen and received, the more I reveal my core internal needs and desires to my conscious awareness. I have been coming INTO clarity around my desire to flourish in this space, to share my creative weavings and offer my gifts into a fertile ecology that FEELS reciprocal and nourishing. "What does that even mean??!" I ask myself. And the deeper I inquire with this, the more I understand about what nourishes me, what signals resourcedness in my heart and body, and what my motivations are for showing up here. Its layered. And it includes a community of resonant folks who are willing to be part of what I am sharing. Its freakin vulnerable. Glad to hear others are IN this creative unfolding. 💞
You are SO not alone in this, navigating the slow unravelling of fears and motivations and narratives we believe. I’ve loved getting further into this community of creators on substack, the encouragement and engagement has been so uplifting, knowing I’m not alone in this and we all start somewhere
Aleesha, I always look forward to reading your posts. I’m thankful for your vulnerability and your thoughtful/ thought provoking questions.
My fears are that my dreams of fostering and adopting won’t come to fruition. It used to feel so close, and now it feels like a lifetime away. Like it will never happen, like I’m SUPER ill equipped to even consider being responsible for traumatized children ( sometimes even my own children!)
Wow, Julie, I’m not surprised that you’d want to foster/adopt, but I didn’t know that was your hope for the future! Raising children is no joke; I can understand how it feels overwhelming to just focus on your own family, let alone bringing more littles in.
How would you feel if you let your timeline be a bit further down the road?
The fear cage is realllllll. We are working on busting through some comfort bubbles right now, and a big one I’m also struggling with is the fear of failure. Even just writing it down, feels like a small achievement haha. It’s been interesting, personally, to trace the map back a bit and consider how/where it may have began and recognise just how much of my behaviours/actions were born out of fear, that I didn’t realise was even there. I definitely appreciate the word-keys ❤️
I think fear is a tricky thing; obviously we need it in some circumstances to be safe! But how often does the fear prevent us from doing something that is really meaningful to us? Thank you for being here on this journey with me, friend, as we navigate this tricky terrain ❤️
This is so beautifully articulated Aleesha. I am to one of those "early quitters", when somethings either feels too hard or sometimes even too easy. When I learned that this is another way perfectionism can show up I was amazed! I thought I was just lazy or someone who got bored easily or lacked the discipline to follow through.
I hadn't realised that underneath this "quitting" was a fear of failure.
Articulating dreams and hopes out loud to others than just ourselves is brave AND vulnerable.
I see you and I hold the vison with you that one day you will wake up to 300 new subscribers, and in the meantime, I have added one new one for you :)
That’s interesting, I think I’ve had those same tapes in my head each time I quit something, but I forgot them when I finally understood that perfectionism was the root. It’s so defeating to believe you are just flawed and can’t make your goal happen. But I feel like knowing it’s fear is maybe empowering? Like, I can’t change my basic personality, but I CAN move through the fear? Does that make sense?
Thank you for coming here, I’m so grateful to discover a larger substack community!
Yes exactly! Realising that for myself has felt tremendously empowering. Nowadays I am more of a person that finishes things...!